I know in Vol. 3 I told y’all I didn’t have any faith in the Toronto Reptars (not a typo) nor the Philadelphia L’s (also not a typo), but I STILL picked the respective teams to at least get past a Cavaliers crew that just isn’t that good and a Celtic team coached by some dude I randomly saw walk by my cubicle when I worked for the-company-who-shall-not-be-spoken-of. The moment after that piece was published something in the pit of my Soul Stone told me, “J2, you need to go back and change that s**t because you know damn well that Toronto is about as reliable as Goku is as a present father, and the Sixers got to hold all of the L’s that Meek Mill has amassed.” Toronto got swept and it was so bad that they got 2017-18 Coach of the Year Dwane Casey fired. Not a PREVIOUS COTY, but the CURRENT COTY. Just think about that for a second.
Think about it just a little bit more…
And although DeMar DeRozan and Kyle Lowry absolutely wasted Drake’s time, a lot of the blame for why Casey is without a job goes straight to LeBron James. He came into this series with absolutely no fear of the Barney’s from Canada and took them to the woodshed. It was nothing short of hilarious at first, but during Game 4 I flat out got pissed. Toronto is nothing and the coach wasn’t the problem. They came out and chose to do what they’ve done for maybe the past 3 years and be witnesses to LeBron’s greatness.
On the flip side, Brad Stevens aka The Tech Support Savant put together the troubleshooting guide on how to effectively beat some young buck ass over the course of the Boston/Philly series. He made Ben Simmons’ passing ability a virtual nonfactor. Embiid did what he does for the most part, but those young guys over in Boston had the right amount of magic to just go out and get it done. Brad don’t give a damn who you have on your team nor who he doesn’t have on his, you’re going to get this fundamental basketball, son. Watching him coach masterfully for full games is a thing of beauty. The Celtics are going to be f*****g dangerous next year.
Photo Credit: Masslive.com
If Only Kyrie and Gordon Were Healthy
I picked this as my Eastern Conference Final last year, long before Kyrie Irving and Gordon Hayward made the jump to Bean Town. I also predicted that LeBron would not go to his 8th consecutive NBA Finals, but it looks like injuries may keep that prophecy from coming to pass and prevent me to ascending to the pantheon of negroes that kinda-sorta know what they’re talking about. I’m picking Cleveland to win this series in 6 games, but you all can’t know how hard I want to pick this young Celtic crew to add another notch to this incredible season. I mean look at Game 1. The Celtics played a phenomenal game that left LeBron and the LeBronnaires searching on the ground for their mouthpieces. LeBron won’t play that bad again and the Cavs will pull this out, but take a second and imagine:
The REAL NBA Finals (With Infinity War Spoilers)
It’s finally time for Houston to face off with Thanos, and it’s just a matter of if the Dubs are going to win with a Rapture-inducing finger snap or if they’re going to tag that ass in the same way that the Hulk got tagged. If Game 1 is any indication, the Rockets may be engaged in an exercise of futility.
Harden and CP3 both had a good night and still lost by 13 points. Like… What can you do?
This series may come down to Harden keeping his head in the game. When you hit Harden in the mouth he starts to act just like Hulk in “Infinity War” and refuses to appear again. GSW’s defense is capable enough to throw the punch that would land in the aforementioned proverbial mouth, so we’ll see how that goes. Chris Paul has fit in way better than I thought he would with Harden, and maybe that’s what he needs to keep the Crimson Beard on task.
Golden State vs. Houston may end up going 6 games, but the Infinity Stones have been gathered and it’s about time the NBA starts to “not feel so good.” Too soon? Too savage? I’m sorry, y’all (not really).
J2 created the dance choreography for the “This Is America” video. You’re welcome. I’m woke AF!!!