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  NJL: A Black Nerd Podcast

Goood Moorning, Vieetnaaam!: Part 1

5/21/2018

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Any place that looks like this and is called a "club" gotta have some underground fights going on
Japan does NOT play about overstaying on visas. It’s not like some countries where you can kinda, sorta go over time a few days (or a few weeks) and it’s all good in the hood. Naaah fam. If you suppose to leave Tuesday, January 8th...you better leave Tuesday, January 8th. Otherwise you might stay a few years getting to enjoy their world class prison system, if you’re not lucky enough to be politely escorted out their country, and asked to never come back again. Now I am not saying I knew the exact date my visa expired, but uuuuh..Ya boy definitely knew the date I was expecting to leave Japan, was not the day the great country of the Rising Sun wanted me to leave. It’s hella funny to think about now since I am back in these Tokyo Drift streets, but baaabeeeee when I tell you I was feeling like I was in a Mission Impossible movie for a minute trying to make moves out the country.
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God’s plan though since it allowed me to travel to Vietnam, and see what Southeast Asia has to offer. Specifically I traveled to North Vietnam and had my main hub of hedonistic holiday in Hanoi (say that 10x fast) the capitol of Vietnam.  Now for those interested in traveling to Vietnam, let a brother help you out with a few tips and tricks. First, and most important: Motorbikes rule the streets, and everyone drives like Dom from "Fast and the Furious" just called them "Family". You see that image above like the most interesting Mario Kart race is about to go down? That's Sunday easy traffic. Usually, they don't even stop fam. If it's green they go. If it's yellow they go. If it's red...they go faster, and use humans walking like obstacle cones.  This is real life Frogger and there ain't no extra lives biiih. It will take any sane person a few days to get use to it, and probably a few more days to not even blink when you cross as you yell "YOLO!"​
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I guarantee you if I sent this to Cherry right now, she'd get the woman equivalent of half chub.
Second, Vietnam is really, really inexpensive. Even compared to other Southeast Asia countries  it's hard to beat the Dong (hehehe).  As of this writing 1 USD equals to almost 23,000 VND. Meaning when I felt the urge to splurge on some Western food after missing good cheeseburgers while in Japan (sorry Japan, but when it comes to burgers ya'll lacking severely), for all you see above I spent maaaybe  $10.  This is like opulent spending of money for food in Hanoi. Compared to this local meal below:
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Call this the Hanoi Big 3
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I might have spent $2.50, and honestly...that's still low key expensive lol. I mean it's absurd. Hell, even lodging is inexpensive. Hostels charge anywhere between $2-$5 a night depending on where, and almost all still offer free breakfast, drinks, towels etc. Hotels, you might spend $10-12 a night for 4 star treatment. I wanting to sleep in a bed made for mini gorilla size men like myself, ended up renting an ENTIRE PENTHOUSE APARTMENT FOR A WEEK...$60 bucks. Balling on a budget has new meaning when you're in Vietnam.
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Seriously, these guys were cool. Always found me some how and just wanted to talk and practice their English.
Lastly, brothers and sisters of the black magic,  We are completely an unknown for most Vietnamese. You will either need to have thick skin, or walk with a sense of Black Folk ambassador diplomacy because you will be walking, talking entertainment to them. Not a day went by I wasn't asked to take pictures, practice English, hold a baby, and yes the biggest no no...to touch my hair. Correction. They didn't ask, they just did it. Unlike the Japanese who are polite with their "WTF?" moments when they see me, the Vietnamese in general do not give any fawks. They will stare, follow, point, and some even ran...but hey I am in their city, eating up all the good food, dancing with their women, breathing up all their air so who am I to judge lol? Jokes aside, most of it was just learning experiences and explaining stuff that they just don't see or interact with on the reg, and I get it, and hopefully you can to if you go since it's really a beautiful country with some good people. In fact, part 2 I'll share things to see, where to hang, and what not to do at 5am in the morning when you don't speak the lingo.

Jay

Once got lost on an island, before it became cool to do so on popular tv shows

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